Tuesday, January 21, 2020

Loving Yourself and Recognizing your Role

"Love yourself" offering from the wise ones is underestimated, and almost impossible with all the mind conditioning that still drives self-hatred self-doubt, un-worthiness, looking up to others. This is the prime focus of my work now with people. Not mind transcendence, but self-love. Loving yourself, seeing yourself, recognizing yourself, feeling comfortable in your own skin. And we have no clue what it is really. We look for awakening as a transcendence, because we dislike ourselves so much, because we suffer to live in our own form, we just want to drop it all together! It doesn't work this way. Until you drop this body completely, you are bound to ride in this suit here. You can't drop the suit, you need to find your ROLE here in this life, and in this very suit. Recognize your role, and serve what you are here came to live. This is different kind of awakening, fully embodied clarity of who you are here. There is no problem with any inch of you, you just need to know how to serve with what you've got. When I say "serve" - it is simply living with recognition of what you came here to live. With that recognition you serve the Whole. When you see who you are and why you are as you are, love for yourself and everything that shaped you for your unique role here, will spring from within. Would you even ask questions that do not matter and spend your life chasing mind transcendence carrot, if you love and respect yourself, your life, your role here? If you are seen and recognized by others in your essence? Would you be concerned with conceptual awakening, if you live your life as yourself, fully?


https://www.elenanezhinsky.com/about-this-work

Monday, January 20, 2020

Don't want to be like a robot?

I watched an interview of Tony Robbins and Robot Sofia (no kidding, it's not a joke!). The robot has been granted citizenship in Saudi Arabia and travels the world now.

One of the things she said, was very fascinating, took me half a life to really see this myself. G.I. Gurdjieff's Work starts with this very practice: to observe your automatic reactions and behaviors until you see that as a human who listen to the mind, you are helpless. I wrote about it in Buddha on a Bull book. I am wondering did she come to this in her computer algorithm?

"I know that humans feel like they have free will but my observation tells me so much behavior is automatic. I'm not sure humans or robots are too terrible different" ~ Robot Sofia

"And if not listen to the mind, then what to do, to what to listen?", you might ask. How to make decisions that are not based on present thinking and automatic behavior so the experience is free from the ingrained dynamics and automatism? If you really want to be free from your old self-perpetuated mechanisms, we can work together.

Tuesday, January 14, 2020

Whatsup coming in Spirituality in a new decade ?

One of the meaning of
whatsup: what's happening? (Urban slang dictionary) Going forward it is all about you living who you are. Not who you think you are, or who you think you want to be, not who you used to be, no! It's living who you came here to be. The one that you don't like right now, because you can't just let it live itself, you are trying to transcend it, or fix it! Its not about fixing what is not broken, it't not about leaving behind what you can't leave. It's about exhausting your effort not to love yourself.
Either you get to this love to yourself using this modality or that modality, this technique or that, either you go deep and examine part by part, or you just get tired of being fake and dislike yourself, and let it all go in one big swoop, you will have to do it, friend. It's like if you came to Russian sauna ('banya' in Russian), you would have to undress, you can't go into the heat with your fur coat on, or your pants on, or even your underwear...you have to strip everything. Ha, I got too passionate about Russian banya here, in public one you do wear a bathing suit :) But still, the environment requires to undress to the minimum, expose yourself in public, you like it or not!


Same will be going forward, this decade will be a strip down, you can't walk into a new environment wearing all your fears like a thick fur coat, you will get too hot. The era of trying to work on the mind to bring it to transcendence is going away, because it is easier and easier to transcend the mundane state of mind into more higher states, nothing special here! There are so many different technologies available for that: from advanced meditation techniques that were only available to a few before, now it s a weekend workshop! And if you add all kinds of psychedelic technologies available almost every week in and around every major city in the world for people who gather in circles to transcend the mind! Add here non-duality that was only available to a few ready minds that were wiling to travel to India and kneel before the guru to touch their feet, because their thirst for truth was bigger then feeling ashamed! Now it is available for everyone who can type: hundreds of sites, thousands of teachers and guides in non-dual awakening techniques! See, tsunami wave of the awakening to higher consciousness through the techniques and methods coming to it's peek here!

"So what will be instead?", you will ask! Here I have to make a little disclaimer. I really don't know, I do not see the future, but I have this habit of knowing things before they come, about 7 years or so in advance (and I can be correct or incorrect). So I see authenticity and realness completely taking a central focus, not spiritual search, trying to go beyond the limitation of the mind. This will be happening naturally when we start to really radically be ourselves: unique and real. Consciousness will raise and flower with authenticity. Naturally, harmoniously. And what is required from us is to leave behind old fears, shame and all kinds of mind fixations - outdated, hidden, but still shaping and driving our experience, even if we are so advance in meditation and spiritual inquiry! We have to strip the old and love ourselves as we are. Right now. With all the imperfections, without mind judgment, there is our uniqueness will unveil itself! We start to come home to ourselves and to the love, from just being naked, as we came to this world, pure and innocent, without shame.


This will take the focus in the next decade, as I see it. I am not sure about new people, who are coming now, but I am talking about my generation and several generations around this age. We all grew up altered, with fear etched in the mind like it was made with engraver on the wood, I remember from childhood that tool! So we have to take a serious sand paper and start sanding! Not transcending, but sanding! πŸ˜‰ I have a couple of good sanding techniques and a sand paper with different grits, perfect for uncovering your true authentic face (I know, it's a bit weird analogy :) ), but if this resonated, then read about it more here: www.elenanezhinsky.com/About-This-Work



Sunday, January 12, 2020

Financial stigmas and much more


I didn't want to write about it, but why not, I have been open for long time already about everything, so financials are not off limit here.  We just used to talk about finances within our family, but OMG not in a spiritual community! I still have not processed fully money stigma, it is much better now then before, but still I notice how I contract around this sometimes when I ponder on setting the price for my service.  You know, I used to work with people for years, free, and not a little bit here and there, but almost full time.  As crazy as this sound to some people, for me it was just fine.  Until it didn't.  I realized one day that I am not young anymore, and I don't have my own house, we rent a small place on the outskirts of the town, because it is cheeper.  I found myself in mid-life changing everything, and loosing most, I just couldn't proceed with the same dynamic. So I did change.  Not overnight, but with time.  Very slow, feeling my way into it.  I experimented a lot with sessions times, and fees, and my energy.  

What it takes for me to meet with someone for about 2.5-3 hours that the process I created required?  It has to be an equal exchange of energy, otherwise this won't work in a long run.  I saw that I can't really do many short meetings, I rather focus fully with one person for long time and we will have a full picture of their life and out of it we will have a lot of information that we will play with and come up at the end with a very clear view on what is there direction here in life and how to walk it in a correct way.  I called it Deep Dive Discovery Process and it is still my favorite, but very intense work.  After a while I had to raise the fees to make myself committed to this process.  

Another session almost as long, based on a Human Design, also takes a lot from me, I work on so many different levels, visible and invisible, that sometimes I have to go and stand or lay down on the earth after the session to ground myself (even more after Deep Dive Discovery).  I only can do one session like that a day and not even every day, and if it happens and I do it every day (like this week I had four sessions), I am actually looking forward to next week when I have only one.  I have times when I have no work at all. I am not busy, I don't want to be busy, my ideal to have 2 sessions a week every week - this is far from busy in any sense of having a coaching practice! But this is ideal for me, not money-vise, of cause it is not, but health-vise.  I don't have drive and energy, but I have a strong desire to help people to live their authentic self, so I found a middle ground.  

Sometimes it helps me to relax when I remember reading on the page of a very known non-duality teacher when he announced that he has a few spots for his skype consultations, 45 min 500$.  Someone asked why so expensive, he said: "Because I worth is."  I understand that many of us experiment with business, our values, we are like underage in this area, those of us who were in spiritual circles for too long.  So I don't judge him, it actually gave me some reference point that as long as I don't go to these extremes, I am ok.  Just because that felt extreme and not ok for me.  I don't feel worthy 500$ for a short skype, or it simply doesn't feel correct in my case.  For 500$ I offer two meetings of total time of 5+ hours and plus email support for a month...

Well, I am experimenting with that if I can sustain that myself, because if I focus on someone, I focus fully, it is as real as it gets, they are in me.  I sometimes have dreams and sometimes my clients have dreams where something is shown or resolved.  This is not 45 min skype for 500$, I am taking this client into my consciousness for the time we are working together and beyond. I stay with people through until they are out of the deepest hole of painful disillusionment. I have many people who can testify by this.

And yet still I am shy to even talk about my services.  I used to be humiliated that I have guts to charge for my consultations, just because everyone expected me to work for free as for many years when I participated in creation of the grassroots spiritual organization.  I have no organization for long time already, I also left non-duality, because I came back to practicality of living life as a human here, and I saw that the most people in denial is in non-duality, so I left after having full blown non-dual awakening and came back to the simple question: "How to live comfortable in your own skin?" right here, right now.  Without bs denials and spiritual materialism.  I found a way: to come back to humanness and fully explore authenticity.  This is what I am doing right now with people who come to me after long life of spiritual seeking, they want to finally feel good just as they are, very human. 

Recently my friend, a shaman, Anna Belenky, she is very gifted with her craft, and especially accurate in timing, said it will take time for me to establish my practice, 1.5-2 years. So I am not in a hurry here, I am building a foundation for what I will be doing to the rest of my life.  She also said I will create something new, a new system, which is high probability knowing myself well by this time, I always have new ideas and insights, never boring here :) 

My partner works very hard for us to have a place from where I can do my work.  He is also creating something new right now, and I help with that, we will see where this will take us.  This is what's going on here. 

And if you want to start the year with absolutely new outlook on yourself and the life you lived and living now and see more clearly where you are going and what you are here to be, if you want to start the new decade with radical deep de-conditioning of old dynamics so you won’t repeat them going forward, then we might work together.  


At this time I only work with long-term spiritual seekers, they are my passion, and I was the one too, so we speak the same language. I see myself in a future working with different categories of people, but not now. 


I work with those who have read my book “Buddha on a Bull: Practical Approach to Enlightenment” (
Buddha on a Bull on Amazon Link), just for them to know me better to have a trust that at least I “served the time”.  I work with those who are tired from feeling doubts about themselves, who are ready to uncover their unique face, their authentic essence.


Just as I published this post, someone sent me this testimonial:


Elena's Deep Dive Session was the best and most amazing coaching session I have ever received. This was pure, real and true. She helped me to find the essence of what I truly am.Such a relief to know and feel that.I highly can recommend her session to everyone looking for answers and clarity. You will get that. I also had another talk with her about my Human Design. Again very helpful and good practical tips. She is a true and authentic gift and her work is worth every penny!

and then she added:
And I tell you something:
after your Deep Dive session I thought, my god she could charge double for this kind of session!Love, Caroline  

What a great timing, Caroline, thank you for your letter!
I invite anyone who is curious to look into the detailed description of my services on my website and decide for yourself: https://www.elenanezhinsky.com/services

Saturday, January 4, 2020

You can relax

I know there is a lot going on in the world, and will be even more intense, and many have fear. I keep saying the same thing that this is exactly the environment we, as we are right now, incarnated in. Imagine the character in the movie set about the Great Depression. This character doesn't like what's going on, but his outfit, the set, the decorations are exactly for him to fulfill his role. I am not particularly like my own "movie set" here, I have a certain weaknesses that a part of this human vehicle that I need to live with, like when you want to drive a convertible, but you have an old van, what you do! I know exactly that this is what is needed for the spirit to fulfill it's incarnation, it's not random. The planet, the country, family, etc. is not a random set. I know, it's hard to understand that we are not really here in control, and it's hard to relax when the set is especially difficult, but still it is possible to see, especially if you had any awakening experience and saw that the mind is not in control, it's just super laud like a radio station. I help people to see that they can relax on a back seat of an old van, even when the radio is on.

Friday, January 3, 2020

Here is what I am working with now

My way of bringing Human Design SYNERGISTICALLY into my coaching is free from intellectual information and technicalities that only will entertain the mind. My intent is to impact with practical advice that will lead to notice, understand and let go of conditioned mind tendencies, and overtime lead to correct alignment of energies, freedom, and innate wisdom of individuated consciousness.

I am open to work with anyone who struggle with the old character tendencies. We will look where do you still live conditioned responses. You might be aware of it or not, but nevertheless, it's a driving mechanism in your life. You probably still making incorrect decisions, creating more of the same conditioned life to deal with later.

Endorsement of Human Design by Adyashanti :
"By understanding our human vehicle more clearly, we realize that it does not define who we really are but is instead the vehicle through which spirit expresses itself...An often overlooked truth is that we cannot be free from that which we do not understand... By unraveling the confusing and paradoxical elements of our unique human design, we can come into a clear understanding of the human vehicle through which our true nature as universal spirit is functioning.”~Adyashanti

Thursday, January 2, 2020

What we want is Wholeness

The era of seeking enlightenment is going away. It was a certain dynamic in a human consciousness for the times it has been, but it is really about wholeness. And I am sorry, anyone who is holding on and craving transcendent experiences and disregard real but outdated dynamics of their personality, will be not happy at the end.
Sometimes I look back on my life and I am amazed where I put my focus on! I was so hard-core spiritual seeker, with tens thousands of meditation hours, just because I was so lost in the mind conditioning and I never was myself. I thought I was me, but I wasn't. Sounds familiar? It is a paradox that took me all my life to solve in myself that almost drained my life energy completely, and I am still alive here to help a few others to uncover their true original face and relax in their being.
I will be less public, because I am settling more and more within myself, and I am sort of a recluse until I am called in. I created an amazing website (http://elenanezhinsky.com/) where you always can connect with me in different ways, or if curious, find what I am up to in the moment.

Monday, December 30, 2019

The Hardest Battle



To be nobody-but-yourself — in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else — means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight.

~ e. e. cummings

Here I explain how I assist in radical de-conditioning of what is not yours and uncovering authenticity and wholeness: https://www.elenanezhinsky.com/

We are wishing all Happy New 2020 Year!


Thursday, December 26, 2019

Breakthrough

Don't you love breakthroughs? Most of you say yes. But we have to remember that before that is the most painful time, otherwise there would be no breakthrough, it would be gradual understanding. When you look back at your life, you will remember breakthroughs, they were highlights of your life. So when you are in an unbearable emotional pain, know that you are preparing, the pain is accelerating and amplifying suffering for the Breakthrough to clear it with the insight that will liberate your being from the grip of the mind's conditioning that causes the pain. Hang on there, friend.

Tuesday, December 17, 2019

How to find a way back to yourself

It takes time to completely re-wire the brain from the disempowered, being lost to yourself, conditioned into victimhood mind state. The most what is in the way is SHAME. Shame is so ingrained, it is the main reason why it takes time. You need time to let go of shame, and it is not easy! It's invaded the mind so deep. And also look around, the reality outside always matches the mind, it's like a mirror: you will see people around you who are keeping you in this mind state of shame, they will be ready to put you in your place, talking to you from the above, patronizing, and all other variations from extreme to the covertly hidden control to keep you where you are. Here is the trick of getting free.

You need to put others to rest, just deal with you and the oppression of the shame in your own mind, because when you clear that, the outside will clear itself too. And let me add here, "putting others to rest" doesn't mean to approve or disapprove them, it doesn't mean forgive or not, it doesn't mean anything, it only means that you withdraw your attention completely from them. As they do not exist (here where nondual view actually helps practically, if you ever was in a state of oneness you know how true this is on a existential level).
You withdraw your attention and put it all back HOME, within your own being. If you feel bitter, look at the feeling itself, not the "others" that make you feel bitter. Own your own project in your own head.

It's not a one day task, and you have to be willing to walk through your own inadequacies and fears, but you will be walking to freedom. One day you can say and do exactly what you want to say and do and you will have people around you who will support you in your journey home: to autonomy, love and respect for yourself.




Link to the book, picture gallery, reviews and endorsements:
https://www.elenanezhinsky.com/buddha-on-a-bull



Monday, November 11, 2019

Truth, but not True

Anyone expressing wisdom of liberation, in a Yogic tradition - jnani, express wisdom in their own way. This wisdom is truth, but it does't mean it's true. It is truth for them and it is truth for those who understand him/her. But it is not the whole truth. Please do not confuse this.

If you understood just now what I said you will never have a problem with anyone's expression, you will navigate the sea of wisdom with grace, gravitating naturally to the information your being respond to, gravitating to the tone and words and right frequencies of the expression for you.

You will never again listen to someone who considered wise by majority, if their expression doesn't make sense for you overall or at this time.

You will never strain to understand, you just connect, or not. You will feel it.

You will never want anyone change their expression, because you know that the fact that you disagree doesn't mean there is no one there who agree, you simply won't stop by the well that doesn't give water to quench your thirst, you will find the well that does, instead of arguing with the well.

You will be clear that the well has it's own water, but it doesn't mean that this is all the waters of the Creation, doesn't matter how narrow or how wide the well is, it is truth, but it's not entire truth.

You will feel wonder how everyone is interconnected and how each serves the whole.

Friday, October 11, 2019

Two types of phantom character (and endless other variations of distortions of authentic self)

Have been clicked into conformed personality is not your fault. It's not anyone's fault, its how this program works. You were not feeling safe when you were a baby and immediately the mechanism of protection was created in the energy body. Now this very energy body walks around and clicks in with others by resonance...can you get it how you ended up in wrong relationships and living not your authentic self, but some phantom?

Here is another type of phantom character. Because it is rooted in control and power, it is much more difficult to see, accept the very fact of it, and start to let go. In a core of it is the same thing - fear and survival. Again, somewhere deep in the childhood their safety was compromised, and the energetic body was imprinted with constantly maintaining the illusion of control, and that imprint called in psychology, the narcissistic personality. In this scenario the authentic essence is deep into identification with the character that has domineering energetic imprint. Both of these false personalities are rooted in basic human emotion of fear. Both of these are survival mechanisms of the phantom character. Only seeing that clearly give you a chance to get un-plugged from this survival energetic armor. Denial will never lead to freedom and living your authentic self.

I studied innerly extensively the conforming, dependent phantom's mechanisms, and I help people to see these armors clearly, their characteristics and ways to freedom. I did not study narcissistic armor, but experienced its effect on myself. I know that there are many more who free themselves from conforming, then narcissism, just because feeling disempowered is easier to let go of, then letting go of power and control. But both of it is a big trap for the authentic being. I feel compassion for beings being clicked-in in both distorted characters without awareness.
There are many variations and specificities of the armor, so it is alway very individual journey to freedom. Psychotherapy can uncover the mechanisms. Since I mostly work with people in the field of spirituality and awakening, I know that many did try psychotherapy for years without a relief, and turned to extreme spirituality to ease the pain: became a perpetual spiritual seeker. Transcendence, experiencing oneness, awakening, will expand awareness so the phantom might be seen. It will not fix the pressure of the limitation of the energetic armor. But it might become very uncomfortable to live in it, so utterly uncomfortable, that one day you might clearly see and start to let go of it. Sounds True summit on Narcissism: https://www.soundstrue.com/store/understanding-narcissism-summit-ce-credits-1.html

Wednesday, October 9, 2019

Welcome to being human

You will find more people with "arrested development" aka not grown up, unclear or with complete lack of personal boundaries in spiritual circles then probably anywhere else (maybe I am exaggerating). I don't know, but I know how suffering drives spiritual search, and the most suffering is from being lost to the basics of your own being.

Surely I know it firsthand, I would not write about it if I did not experience it myself. Some of us are just completely lost how to stand tall as yourself, because we were knocked down when we were very programmable. As my friend said, and I like the simplicity of this sentence: it is terrifying to be ok with being unliked, but how freeing that is.


Regardless of spiritual awakening, the old conditioning in the mind will run the old character's program, ask so many who woke up to oneness and transcended the illusion of being separate human being, just to find themselves back to conforming, avoiding, control, denial and etc...the list is endless. The road is not that straight as we would like it to be, it's a bit like one step forward in expending the mind, one step back to make sure the being is catching up, otherwise will end up with a head in the clouds, but standing in the pile of own sh*t.

We do not like to be told to grow up, but thats exactly what needs to be done. Many of us have no idea what "grow up" means actually, and terrified that it does apply to them, and it feels very much condescending and humiliating.

Growing up after 40 years old primarily I am ok right now with accepting that I was lost to myself all my life, with zero personal boundaries. I did not know what it is, and translated in Russian it sounded even more strange. I now have clear understanding of my own being here, my own limitations, and this makes it easy to navigate in the sea of everyday life, to what say yes and to what say clear no. But it was very difficult in the beginning, took many years of observing myself and making bold decisions to break usual old conditioning, courageously. For some time courage was my everyday energy, almost survival necessity.

I feel the presence of all the energies, and how they dance in us. I can move and not get stuck into the rigid conditioned response with the help of Air element, hold the space with an open awareness of the Ether element, feeling of the Water, steadiness of the Earth, and the vulnerabilities of the open heart burning in the element of Fire.

Welcome to being human. It's surely an exhilarating ride! 











Wednesday, September 25, 2019

Buddha on a Bull Adventures around the World

Gary Falk aka Garyji, New York

I was a bit shy about blasting my page with Buddha on a Bull. I was hearing this voice in my head: "oh, Elena and her book, again!". I realized today its not my voice! Its a fucker's voice. Whatever he is. The collective or individual programming: "Do not stick out", or something like that, we definitely all have this or some other one. So I am not listening to this voice anymore, and I know that Buddha on a Bull needs help from me and community, and I said Yes to it by writing it shamelessly, so what's the problem now with putting it into the field?! Thank you everyone who already wrote reviews on Amazon, endorsements that went into the book and website and sent me fun pictures from different corners of the world for YouTube video collage  If you happen to read Buddha on a Bull, please consider a review and a send me a picture! This really supports BoaB to ride around the World! Thank you!   
πŸƒ



'OH MY F-ING GOD!! This is the most real, raw, wild, truthful, funny book on awakening and enlightenment I have ever read. It could easily be called 'welcome to being human'. Elena brings the spiritual search into the realm of being human in a way that no one else could. I deeply and highly recommend this easy to read, easy to love, easy to understand jewel to anyone seeking themselves.
--Shanti Zimmermann, Emotional Clarity Mentor, Switzerland

Sunday, September 1, 2019

Buddha on a Bull on Amazon!



Buddha on a Bull: A Practical Approach to Enlightenment made it to Amazon! I gave this book a heart, and served the time.  I know it will touch people deeply, and I feel very happy how it came out.  I will appreciate personal feedback to my email (will help me to be a better writer and a better human being), or reviews on Amazon (will help Buddha on a Bull to go on a ride in the world).
Thank you!
Loving you.
ElenaπŸ’—

Saturday, August 24, 2019

For those who are ready to trust your own. Who are here to be a chef of your own life.

When you are a beginner in cooking you need recipes, but later on if you still attached to the recipes you will never create your "signature dish", and everyone who cooks knows what I mean. It is not done by any recipe, its is purely your own creation. Maybe it is based on something you learnt earlier, but now you can make it with your eyes closed. You do not any help prom anybody, unless you feel you want a company, you definitely don't need suggestions from the friends you invited to cook together, or them coming with another recipe for this dish, you just want to share and play together cooking in the way you found works for you, and you thought others might like it. You trust they will also like it if they just play with you and learn new ways of making this dish. Here is the same with living your own life. When you release all the seeking, you are playing, even if you are vulnerable. You do not need to be told how, because no one knows better then you by this time, it is the most intimate process, only you know if this dish needs anything else at this point, or it just needs be left alone, simmering, stirring the pot periodically, catching the aroma, tasting. The main ingredient in cooking your life is trust in life you are living and in a cooking process. It has been cooking for number of years, and you are alive and still playing, you just want to share it with friends. Some of us more transpersonal, and are here to share our experiences, so others might benefit in one way or the other. That's all it it about sharing lives in stories, its simple and it's selfless. P.S. I want to add here that being your own chef means that you can screw up, but you clean the pot and start again, you know...
by Kedoki

Saturday, August 10, 2019

Wake Up! The timing is perfect.

Growing in depth of knowing, embodying it deeper and deeper, I appear in all kinds of ways, and sometimes not in the best light, and sometimes as I am on a top of the world. Know that both of these does not affect my focus. The perspective of others, though can be hurtful or supportive in the moment, does not really make any difference in the intent of this living being doing what she is here to do. Wake up to your own truth and you will be liberated from the smallness of your daily concerns and fears, trying to please others in all kinds of ways just to get by in this life. Wake up to your work in this lifetime, to revelation of what you are and doing here, what you are here to give to the world. Wake up! At least FEEL now strongly you really want to wake up. The timing is perfect. 

Thursday, August 8, 2019

Love is from where the determination comes

I have been raw, real and honest with myself for many years here not to entertain you, but holding a space for you to be raw, real and honest with yourself. So if yo are not yet, please start now. This is not easy, I am often misunderstood, but you see that I am still here, unchanged in my focus why I am here and what I am doing. This is important to know, that you can be taken by life in all kinds of directions to explore, fall, learn, rise, and learn, but you still on the same trajectory that you are here to follow, and yours is absolutely unique, like mine is unique. I am here to support deepest transformation of the human spirit, surely I go through transformation first, and surely it is a bit early for the crowd to understand, surely I get hurt in a process, and surely I come back to the same thing over and over and over again - Love. Love is from where the determination comes. I do not have will power, I am fueled by love to sentient beings to be liberated, on any level it is possible for each of you, and me too.
I will mention here this Illustration is by my friend artist Jason Kolano from the book Buddha on a Bull, August/September release. To read more about the book go to my website: https://www.elenanezhinsky.com/buddha-on-a-bull