I've been on the search for about 40 years. Everything has fallen into place since yesterday...

Monday, January 7, 2013

I've been on the search for about 40 years. Everything has fallen into place since yesterday...

Robert M.:

Dear Elena, I've been on the search for about 40 years. Recently I discovered non-duality and have been exploring that through the books of Greg Goode, Rupert Spira and Francis Lucille. My wife has started searching as well and came upon the LIberation Unleashed website yesterday.

We downloaded Gateless Gatecrashers, and I read several chapters today. The chapter with the dialog with Shane Wilson did it for me! It all came together for me. So now I'm just sitting with experiencing and living right now. No questions right now, but I may return.

What you are doing is quite remarkable, by stripping away everything but the inquiry of whether or not the "Me", the "I" is real. Everything has fallen into place. What I'm left with is present awareness, with no agenda, no trying to control, no trying to change things.

Many blessings, Robert
Elena Nezhinsky

Are you outside of the experience "sitting with experience?"
Robert M

More like just experiencing. Magnificent world we're living in, isn't it?
Elena Nezhinsky

Robert, anything missing in this moment?
Robert M

Not a thing. Which is pretty remarkable in itself.
Elena Nezhinsky Would you mind if i post for you several questions you can ponder on and write?

here they are...take your time, as much as you need, ponder, look, sit on it or just write spontaneously, ok? Thank you!
1) Is there a 'me', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works.

3) How does it feel to see this? describe in detail.

4) How would you describe it to somebody who has never heard about this illusion but is curious about it.

5) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look? was there a specific moment when seeing happened or was it gradual? what exactly happened?
Robert M

OK. You are amazing!

1. Only thoughts about a me. Beliefs, identifications, obsessions, a seeming of a me, but no me.

2. An attachment to a point of view and being right about it. Making others wrong who don't conform to that point of view. Controlling, dominating, justifying, blaming. It starts with a thought I believe. There is attachment, grasping. It runs on automatic and can be triggered by any thought or perception or sensation.

3. I've been seeing this for quite awhile now. To me, to know this but not know how to be free of it has been very frustrating. Every technique I've used to see this and get past this has perhaps helped some, but not lead to liberation. Lots of confusion. Trying to improve the I, trying to better, more successful. Lots of striving. Some understanding but then more confusion.

4. Do you ever feel like you're living a "substitute existence?" You seem to have a life but it is flat, it's full of struggle and disappointments. Did you ever wonder why this was so, why there wasn't more juice in life, more love, happiness, and fulfillment even though you have all the symbols of success? Have you ever thought what might be missing even though you think you have everything?

5. The direct seeing that there was no I or me that exists and your emphasis about that was the key. I was reading the inquiry with Shane, and I wrote down the questions and did my best to answer them honestly. And I just got it. How can I add anything to this self, this false self because it doesn't even exist? What a wast of effort to try to change it. So it happened in an instant, but you might say it happened gradually because for the past few months, I've bee reading Spira and Goode and Lucille and getting a god conceptual grasp of all of this. Then it was as if I got the punchline.

I'm on vacation right now in Mazatlan Mexico, so we just went out and it felt pretty amazing all day, but not because it's "Sunny Mexico."
Many thanks, Robert