Thursday, June 15, 2023

Never forget your roots

I have an unusual story of someone who forgot their roots. Early on I left my homeland and never looked back, I only was reading and writing in English and eventually was thinking and dreaming only in English. 

Usually immigrants preserve their heritage, they read books and watch movies, follow news about their country of origin, especially if they left as adults. I left when I was 21, this was unconscious rebellion to the inner suffering that I dropped Russian/Ukrainian roots with all the culture and ability to think, speak and write in Russian. Precious baby went with all the dirty water. 

Two years ago it all came back in one big swoop πŸ”₯πŸ”₯πŸ”₯ through the tremendous fire energy created by the war of the brother nations. I don’t know how I processed 30 years of absence to anything Russian in such a short time! 

My brain re-remembered it all and seems like it wasn’t damaged from long absence from Russian language inside the head, it started to think in Russian, dream in Russian at night and write in a pretty decent way, still better then speaking, but speaking will improve when I am able to visit Russia/Ukraine in a couple of years. 

The Русский language inside my head changing me, it’s deepened me, it brought new dimensions to my being, it is clarifying what is really important in my life as a Human. 

Russian language (Ukrainian too, and I am sure all the Other ancient languages), even in its modern form, is much more holographic- every word is a world in itself, like matrioshka, it has a root that has a real ancient meaning and sound of the word often is the real sound in nature. 

The ancient languages are living energies, and if it lives inside your head as thoughts, and you can decode them and feel them in you, they are moulding your being.  

I was writing something very personal to my relative in Ukraine, she speaks several languages. I started to write in English about my father, and as soon as I switched to Russian, I saw - thinking and writing in English allowed me to disassociate from being deeply hurt, unconsciously I was using language in a way not to feel whats really there. Thinking in Russian created an inner environment of real feeling and it struck me. 

I saw this today and want to share with all of the different people displaced from your homeland, and we know that the whole United States is full of displaced people, even if your parents were born here, their parents came from somewhere else. And Natives that were displaced by those grandparents, suffered even more. 

“A tree, no matter how thick its trunk, it is the roots that help to withstand the gusts of a furiously raging wind in bad weather.

The strength of a person is in the heritage of his Ancestors. Never forget your Roots.” ❤️πŸ”₯πŸ™

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