Authentic Face

By some messages I read I see that some people are lost in their set character and have no idea they are. They hear me talking about myself with awareness of the conditioned character and it's roles, and they assume it has nothing to do with them, they think their existence as a character they know with all the supporting neurological responses, physiology, habits of the mind, set ways in life, familiar ways they hold themselves, gestures, postures, aspirations, ideas and etc...it's them. They have no idea that what responds to life is not them, but conditioned mind. Doesn't matter really even if you are awake to some degree to bigger perspective, even worse, then you are really fucked. Until all that persona that you hold start to crumble and you allow it to die, to dissolve, you will never see your authentic face. You might think you know your authentic face, but thats another layer of denial. Don't think you can oversmart life, if you really honest with yourself, you will be able to give yourself to life fully. It is different in everyone's case, but it requires to scarifies everything you know about yourself and allow yourself be pushed, challenged, break, and loved by life itself  🙏

I hope more people wake up from a deep sleep

I hope more people wake up from a deep sleep.
All the chaos that is happening helps to shake people from the familiar place. Things are organized on this plane to keep us in the dark, sort of keep us in "our place". It's hard for people to understand that they have a certain place and it's on the bottom of the social pyramid, it's especially hard to see it here in America where people thought they live in democracy and they matter. It is also hard to see it for spiritual seekers who believe "we all one" denial concept taken out of the context of the actual transmutative experience.

It was very hard for me to see the real organization on this planet, because I am naturally positively inclined, I see goodness first. To see what's going on was very painful, it took years until I was able to digest this and accept that this is the life I was born to live, this is exactly the environment for life in this form to fulfill it's intent. It started with Gurgieff 's book "Belzebab Tales to his Grandson", I remember the feeling of deep grief it evoked as I was reading how Belzebab described humans and how life organized on Earth. It was 1999 or so. It's 2020 now. This is how long it took me to be able to look without turning away.

So I understand that people turn away from some things, it's just too scary, too crazy, too out there, it's conspiracy. These disillusionments are painful, every level of illusion, doesn’t matter what part of it, was painful to see. I am a bit more prepared psychologically to face these monumental changes on Earth that started to be visible. They will continue to shock the world going forward for the next cycle, until it’s complete. It will be completely different world. It’s a bit unsettling sometimes, but mostly thrilling to live at these times ! I still can't believe we are actually living it. It is absolutely mind-blowing to be able to be alive now and witness the change of epoch.

We all need to wake up to spaces in us that are dormant, they are different for different people, can be on a very fine level, existential, or very much mundane, like how this society is organized, and what our place in it, where is the real power, who controls how we live. I am here basically just to talk about my own experience, in all kind of different ways, so hang with me, maybe something will be helpful one day or another. From the whole array of what I read and saw in the last couple of months of "pandemic" one doctor really stood out for me. He was talking in a way I see humanity, diversity, variety, life, Nature. He was talking about beauty of everything, the viruses included.

Here is the link to the interview of this doc. His name is Dr. Zach Bush, M.D., and watch his other videos, they are very very potent, not only to make sense of this "pandemic", but expand the mind to the systemic view of life. Though every system still limited, but his systemic view is much more higher order then completely linear view of fear-based "Stay at home and wear mask" sort of thing. Dr. Zach Bush on Covid 19 and more

And of cause, watch George Carlin, he still lives in his brilliant monologues that can reveal a lot if you are willing to hear.

🌈

Do Your Works

I was asked by one block today how I enjoy the present moment when I express strong feelings. Oh yes, I feel. I have feelings. Do you? Are you feeling flat and disengaged and you call that balance? I have feelings of care, concern for human beings. I feel humanity's feelings, sometimes it is overwhelming, and I cry, I let the river of compassion wash out my being. I am not ashamed by my deep feelings, not in denial, I am a human, a woman, a mother, a role model for some.

This is not a matter of artificial enjoyment out of denial of your feelings. This is a matter of living yourself fully. This brings real enjoyment of every moment I breath and live who I am. When I express what I want to express, without holding, without fear, without denial, I am living whom I came here to live, and truth of my being expressed is absolute joy to participate in. What can be more fulfilling then expressing who I am, without fear? Each moment is complete. I live in childlike curiosity for life and eager to play every moment, ask my partner.

Wake up to who you are, not transcend and escape who you are, and you will enjoy the present moment truly. You will enjoy being human, seeing and feeling and being exactly what you are here for. I have seen enough spiritualized defensive spiritual seekers who are compensating their disembodiment protective mechanisms developed early on in life, unable to see the fullness of humanness. I was one of them, so I can talk about it in details that only possible for me because I did the works. Do your works, people.